Soon and on the train

I'm going to be on the train, so of course tomorrow, I'll probably have lots to say. BUT the train sometimes makes me sad. Mostly because once a while ago I was commuting into the city every day and I witnessed just how horrible people can be and it made me sad. While I was stuck on my train, I watched this guy on crutches struggling down the steps to the platform and walk toward the train across the platform from me. Then the doors closed on him, and there was a guy in the door watching him come down the stairs- all he had to do was stick his briefcase in the door and it wouldn't have closed and this guy could have gotten on. But he didn't. He stood and watched and did nothing. So many of us do. I don't always, but I try, I really try. All he had to do was stick his briefcase in the door... I think I cried a little. I cry at sometimes at apathy.

I'm kind of strange like that though. Sometimes, especially during the holiday, the mall can bring me to tears. A million years ago, (okay maybe in 2002) I went to the mall in Camp Hill, Pennsylvania and in the food court there was this place called boardwalk fries I think. A bunch of us were at the mall christmas shopping and we went there for cheese fries. The guy there was probably in his late 40s early 50s and he had a hearing aid in each ear and he was so sweet. Just excited to be there making fries. This was enough to break my heart, because I though about what his story was. Why was he there at the mall making french fries? Was there somewhere he'd rather be, people he'd rather be with? Or had he lost everything and this was all he had? Anyway, there were teenagers laughing at him and there were people behind me were complaining because he was taking too long... I don't know, it actually made me cry. Maybe he didn't care, but it bugged the shit out of me. Why are people so awful? Human suffering... I can't take it, and I can't always "get in there" and help because I get so overwhelmed by it that I'm useless. It's a little frustrating sometimes.